


That's Okay with Me Now

by Rae222



Category: 911 - Fandom, Buddie - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Mentions of Sex, idk ive never made one of these before
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 07:54:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29805288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rae222/pseuds/Rae222
Summary: Buck is worried about taking the next step with Eddie, and asks Hen for some advice.(Basically last night I was wondering how the writers will work this out on the show if and when Buddie becomes canon and decided to write down one possible scenario. This is my first ever real fanfic and completely self-indulgent! lol but if you like it you should let me know because I'm a very insecure individual and thrive on complements. :) Be kind, I am fragile.) -Title is from Sleeping In by All Time Low, because it's been stuck in my head for days.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 9
Kudos: 127





	That's Okay with Me Now

“Hey Hen, do you have a minute?” Buck asked, closing his locker slowly. They had just finished a grueling shift and everyone was in a hurry to get home, leaving the room empty save for the two of them.

“Sure Buckaroo, what’s up?”  
She came to sit on the bench in front of him.

Buck sat next to her, and stared at a particularly interesting spot on the floor.  
“I have a bit of a dilemma that I’m hoping you can help me with, but it’s kind of embarrassing and intimate.”

“Buck, if you have some kind of ‘infection’ I do not want to know. I’m not even a doctor yet and also- I do not want to know.”

“No, no, it’s nothing like that!” Buck hurried to reassure her. “Besides, you know I’m with Eddie now.”

“Hey,” she said raising both hands, “I don’t know what the two of you get up to in your free time, and for the record, that’s another thing I do not want to know.”

“That’s just it Hen,” he went back to staring at the spot on the floor. “We haven’t gotten up to anything yet.”

Hen was quiet for a beat.

“Wait... really?”

“Yeah, really,” Buck said, slowly meeting her stare of disbelief. “And it’s not that we don’t want to - well at least it’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just... I’ve never...” 

“With a guy before?”

“Exactly!” Buck said relieved she understood him. “And I know the mechanics are different, and I know neither of us have... worked this type of machine before, and what if it’s too much for us, or what if we don’t know how to work it, or we don’t like it, or what if-“

“Buck, slow down,” Hen said, placing a hand on his knee to get his attention. “You need to get out of your head.”

Buck took a deep breath. 

“I know, that’s what my therapist said, but I’m just scared, I don’t want to mess this up.” He tugged at his hair slightly, exasperated. “What Eddie and I have is good, it’s really good. But what if it’s not all good? What if this one thing isn’t good? Will that be it for us?”

“Look Buck,” Hen said, forcing him to meet her eye. “Sex isn’t everything in a relationship, what you and Eddie have transcends the merely physical. And deep down you know that.” She gave his knee a pat. “That being said, the physical kinda becomes second nature when you have those feelings for someone. It just kinda... falls into place. Have you guys tried to ... operate the machinery yet?” 

Buck could tell this conversation was making her more than a bit uncomfortable, but the fact that she was trying meant a lot. He was definitely going to get her a good birthday gift this year. She deserved it.

“No,” he shook his head. “We’ve gotten close a couple times, but we both have ended it before it goes that far. I know he’s scared too.”

“Have you guys talked about how you’re feeling yet?” Hen asked. 

“No, I know we should, but it’s so... awkward.” As he said the words he knew it was a silly excuse not to talk to his partner, but it was the truth.

“Look Buck, just talk to him. He’s your boyfriend. You’re going to have plenty of awkward conversations if you want to be in a healthy committed relationship. You should hear some of the things Karen and I talk about. So go ahead and start with this awkward conversation. I promise it will be the first of many.”

“Okay... and then?” Buck asked.

“And then trust yourselves.”

Buck gave a small laugh of disbelief.

“Seriously,” Hen said. “You’ve been intimate with other people before, Buck. You know that when you get to a certain point instinct just kicks in right?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Get out of your head and let instinct kick in,” she urged. 

Buck let out another deep breath. He was still worried, but there was definitely something about getting advice from Hen that made him feel a little lighter.

“Thanks Hen. I know this doesn’t seem like an obvious topic to discuss with you, but I just knew you’d know what to do. You always do,” Buck said as he flung his duffle over his shoulder and stood up.

Hen followed him out of the room. 

“Well, given my limited knowledge on the subject you really should ask Google any other questions you still have- but in a private browser not at work!” She was quick to add.

Buck chuckled.

“Gotcha!”

———

They were curled up on Eddie’s couch, their kisses getting steamier by the second. Christopher was at his tia Pepa’s, giving them the freedom to get carried away. 

Eddie’s hand had inched its way under Buck’s shirt, spreading across his back, and sending sparks of heat through Buck’s body. 

They were approaching the point where they usually put a stop to things.

Not this time, Buck thought.

“Eddie,” he said as he pulled away from his lips. Eddie followed his mouth like a magnet, not ready to part yet.

“Eddie,” Buck said firmer this time, and placed his palm on Eddie’s chest to create some distance. “We need to talk.” 

“Uh oh,” Eddie said finally breaking out of his lust filled trance. “The old ‘we need to talk’ line. Right in the middle of an epic make out session. That can’t be good.”

“You thought it was epic? Really?”

Eddie smirked. “Definitely,” he said.

Buck gave a shy smile.  
“Me too,” he said, and let Eddie kiss him again, before he replaced his palm on his chest.

“Just give me a minute to say what I have to say and then we can continue,” he said.

“Promise?” Eddie asked, dimple popping, and Buck cursed himself for trying to be an adult who communicated instead of pushing him down on the couch and kissing him senseless. 

Buck took a deep breath to compose himself.

He kept his palm on Eddie’s chest as he spoke, something about the touch giving him strength.

“It’s nothing bad, just... I want you to know how I feel. Which is weird because usually I don’t like sharing how I feel with others, which is something Dr.Copeland says I need to work on, but with you I always want you to know. So I think you should know...” he trailed off.

“Know what buck?” Eddie wrapped his hand around Buck’s wrist, pulling Buck’s hand to his chest firmer. Giving Buck more strength.

“I’m scared,” he finally said, looking into Eddie’s eyes. “I’m not scared of being intimate with you, but I’m scared of losing you as a result of being intimate with you. I really really like being with you Ed’s. I love this little family unit we’ve made with Chris. And I’m afraid that if things don’t go well in the bedroom, that maybe... you might not want me anymore.” At the last statement Buck turned his head downward. Unable to meet Eddie’s gaze anymore. 

Eddie used the hand that was not on Buck’s wrist to gently guide Buck’s eyes back to his.

“Buck,” he said earnestly. “how could you think that?”

“Because sex is an important part of an adult relationship,” Buck recited, “and I’ve never... operated this type of machinery before.”

“Am I the machine in this analogy?” Eddie let out a breathy laugh.

“What I’m trying to say is,” Buck said gathering his courage to finish what he had to say. “I want to be with you physically, God believe me I do... I mean look at you, you’re like an adonis. I mean I can still out lift you but-“

“Let’s stop at the part where you think I’m an Adonis.”  
Eddie smiled as he cut off Buck’s rant. 

Eddie used both of his hands to gently pull Buck’s hand from his chest. He held his hand softly in his lap as he stared at him with complete understanding.

“I get what you’re saying,” Eddie said, as his thumb traced patterns on the back of Buck‘s hand. “I get the fear. It’s why I’ve been stopping us before we go further. I just want to do right by you. I don’t want to mess this up either. I’ve never been with a guy before,” he let out a quiet disbelieving laugh. “Never wanted to before you.” 

“But now?” Buck’s voice was quiet, small.

“Now,” Eddie grasped Buck’s hand tighter between the two of his. “I really want to be with you.”

“And if we’re terrible at it?” Buck asked, seriously.

“I’m always going to want you,” Eddie said placing one of his hands against Buck’s cheek. “Sex won’t change that. I don’t think you realize how much you mean to me. And if we suck well, we can only get better right? Practice makes perfect,” he said with a mischievous grin.

Buck couldn’t help the smile that spread over his face.

“So... should we start practicing?” he asked.

“Let’s do it!” Eddie said, standing up and pulling Buck up with him.

They couldn’t help the nervous and excited laughter that escaped them as they made their way to the bedroom.

“Oh,” Buck said as they got to the door. “I googled somethings that might be helpful.”

“Oh did you now?” Eddie laughed as he pulled Buck into the room after him.

———

“Well someone looks awfully happy this morning,” Hen said as she walked up to a very smiley Buck. “Funny, I just ran into Diaz with a very similar expression on his face.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Is it safe to say all went well with the new machinery?”

Buck didn’t think he could smile any wider, but he somehow did. 

“Oh it definitely went well. Really really well,” he said.

“Okay enough, I don’t want to hear anymore,” Hen said, punching him in the shoulder. “But I’m glad it worked out for you two.”

“Me too. Thanks Hen.”

“Thank me by never mentioning your sex life to me again,” she said rolling her eyes.

“Done,” Buck laughed.


End file.
